The Chronicles of Xavier LD Monroe: Chapter II

ay dios mio that coulda become sticky. She was fahn tho. Wait til I tell the homies at work.

I sped out of the parking lot almost as fast as I could. All I could think about was how I dodged a bullet by not interacting with the curly haired girl. I know my abrupt departure prolly seemed rude but I ain’t tryna get in trouble with Bae. Y’all just dunno how crazy Bae gets at times and ain’t nobody got time fa dat shiiiiiit.

But at the same time, I couldn’t help but daydream about what a conversation with Curly might sound like. Would we strike a conversation about Apple iDevices? Would we talk about the weather? Or how unusually hopping the dealer was today? Thur wur people e’rywhur Or perhaps about a ma zing ly gawhgeous her eyes were and how I wouldn’t mind peering into them for a longer period of time?

yo Xa seriously!? You know that would be trouble!

I wonder if she uses the dealer’s atmosphere to write too. I wonder if she’s a closeted Stepford bitch or does she always seem like she would be “the girl next door.” Ugh I need to get her outta my mind and focus on something else. Besides it ain’t like I’ll ever see her again.

I drove down the tree lined street with the windows down. I turned up the radio loud and bumped to Partition by Beyoncé.

Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor [×4]
Like, like liquor, like, like, like liquor
Yoncé all on his mouth like liquor [×3]
Like, like liquor, like, like, like liquor

For whatever reason, that song is my shit! I’m not a Beyoncé fan yes I know The Beygency gon come git me but this song makes me wanna shake E’RYTHANG my mama gave me. Without fail, I rolled down my windows and turned up the radio as loud as my ears could stand. I started singing at the top of my lungs while the summer air blew through my short reddish brown “power to the people” fro.

Oh, there daddy, daddy didn’t bring the towel
Oh, baby, baby be better slow it down
Took 45 minutes to get all dressed up
And we ain’t even gonna make it to this club

I was in mid verse with I heard beep beep coming from the vehicle to the right of me. I could see someone trying to peer into my passenger side window but was failing miserably. I gotta redneck truck yo! Ain’t nobody peeking in.

beep beep

Seriously?! What could this person possibly want?

The light turned green and I sped off down the street. I managed to get far enough ahead to see the car honking at me was a cute little blue Mini Cooper with a white racing stripe. oh ain’t that just cute. The toy wants to race!

At the next light, the Mini Copper rolled up beside me again. This time the driver yelled for me. hey! You! In the redneck truck!

What the fuck?! As far as I knew, I had not crossed into the driver’s lane nor had I attempted that day to run over a random pedestrian. So what in the bloody fucking hell could this person want! In the mist of my rage, I realized the voice was not a dude but a chick.

uh oh! Please don’t let this be Curly! Lawd please let it not be….

I peered over the side of my right window and who do I see smiling at me — the curly haired girl from the dealer. o_O fuuuuuuuck meeeeee!!!!!! I’m a married spud guh! Stop taunting me!

heeeeey I have something of yours

No she don’t.

Bag in the passenger seat.

Lunch box in the back seat.

iPhone in the carrier.

Nope she ain’t got shit. But for good measure, I rummaged through my bag and noticed I didn’t have my iPad case which by the time I discovered what i was missing, she’s holding it up high enough for me to see. is this what I get for running away from a pretty girl?

I lowered my window and asked her to follow me to the grocery store parking lot just up the street. She winked at me and complied with my request. oh fuck no! Even her winks are sexy as hell!! I’m officially in trouble!

We slowly pulled into the parking lot. I hesitated getting out of my truck. I didn’t want to talk or face or even be next to Curly. Once was awkward enough.

I jumped down from my truck and walked around to the front. member to make this quick, Xa, cuz yous a married spud.

She took a minute to get out of her car. Like that ain’t suspect! Finally, she exits her Mini Cooper and she looks just as beautiful and sexy as she seemed not even ten minutes ago at the dealer. I let out a heavy oh-my-fucking-gawd sigh. Every part of me wanted to tell her to just keep the case for herself. I could always find another one or just use the Speck case I already have.

But my dumb ass didn’t move. As usual my mind and body were not on the same wavelength. not the time to be outta sync mind and body! Feet move! Move bitch lets get out da way!!

Nope. Nada. Zilch! body you can be such a fucking dude sometimes

She walked slowly towards me. Every step seemed to take fitty million years. Every step made me even more nervous than the previous. As I she came closer, I kept hoping and praying my phone would ring and I’d have to answer.

No calls.

She finally reached me with my case underneath her arm. why is she not extending it out to me? Look hur you PYT I ain’t got no money to be paying yo ass off for a stupid case.



At this point, I’m slightly annoyed because I hoped this would be over in a jiffy. She’s trying to make small talk and I needs ta go!

look thanks for bringing me my case. That was really nice of you! Hand extended to receive a case that was still underneath her arm.

She looked down at my extended hand then at my case. oh! Ma bad here’s your case

I quickly turned around to start walking back around to the driver’s side door. She followed.

hey I was wondering if we could meet at the dealer some time.

There it was. The invitation I didn’t want to receive. ggggggeeeeeeezzzzzzuuuuuuuusssss now I gotta find a new dealer location. Ugh! The others are bougie!

I don’t think that will be possible. Bae would not appreciate me spending time with you and lawd know I don’t need Bae getting all bent outta shape over you.

Bae don’t have to know. Trifling ass heffa! I knew Curly would say that. And to that I gave her to rudest side eye, thanked her again for returning my case and hopped in my truck. As I sped away, I could see her still standing at her car. Cute girl. But she woulda been just too much trouble.

damn the story for the homies just got juicier!

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